Dealing with Gossip

While researching for a sermon, I discovered this article from a site called, "Know Thyself." As I read it I found myself nodding in agreement. When I hear various gossip which I know isn't true, unfornately, I get frustrated. Case in point: I heard a rumor once. Someone saw me sitting in my truck in the church parking lot for more than a few minutes. They were convinced I must be doing drugs! It didn't occur to them that I might be thinking or praying or, more likely, listening to a book on tape. I listen to books on tape everyday while driving and sometimes I don't want to stop until the end of the chapter. I will sit in my driveway to hear what happens next.

But, this person saw something nefarious in my actions. The truth is the judgements people make say everything about themselve and often very little about the world. "We see the world the way we are, not the way it is," someone once said. When we get angry and lash out at gossipers, it only acts to confirm their opinion: "Well, there you are, look at him, look at her....we must be right!" Here is advice you might find helpful:

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

How to deal with people who gossip about you

A big part of dealing with people who gossip about you is understanding gossip, the thoughts that run in the mind of those who gossip and the psychology behind gossiping.

A person who gossips is someone who carries some resentment towards you and who doesn’t have the courage to face you directly and so he found no other option other than talking about you in your absence.

People will gossip about you if they are jealous of you, if they aren’t strong enough to face you with their concerns or if they feel worthless. Those people try to make themselves more worthy by saying that they are better than someone else.

After all if I am saying that Sam is really dumb then I am only trying to tell people that I am smart or at least smarter than him.

Dealing with Gossip

You now know that the people who gossip about you are really suffering from serious issues and that there is no other explanation for gossiping other than an emotional imbalance that is affecting the gossiper's behavior. (at least at the time of gossiping).

Maintaining your prestige is one of the very important tasks you must do when dealing with gossipers. If as soon as you heard about the gossip you became mad, confronted them or threatened them then this will only show them how badly you were hurt by the gossip and how fragile you are. (see Why am i vulnerable to life problems).

Instead you must appear strong and not easily provoked. Take few days to calm down and during this period try to assess the size of the damage that could happen to your reputation as a result of this gossip.

Try to understand the main cause behind this gossip and the psychological factors involved in order to be able to predict whether this will happen once again or not. For example if you found that your workmates are gossiping about you because they are jealous of you then expect this gossiping to happen frequently.

Good advice for all of us.

Together in Christ,

Pastor Steve

Exodus 23:1, TLB. “Do not pass along untrue r

Contents © 2020 Churchville Presbyterian Church • Church Website Builder by mychurchwebsite.netPrivacy Policy